Rated: 13+ | Warnings: Adult Situations, Coarse Language, Crude Humor, Fluff, Mild Adult Situations, Mild Sexual References, Physical Abuse, Sexual dialogue, Spoilers, Strong Language Main Characters: You Genres: Comedy, Humor, Paranormal Romance | Story Types: Alternative Universe, Parody, Reader Insert Length: 1 chapter(s) / 2306 words | Complete: No
Summary: If your mother marries another man without you ever getting to meet him, or for that matter know he exists, thatís kind of screwed up. For her to then expect you to embrace him and his family and drop everything in your life so you can suddenly come live with them without any prior notice, that's pretty messed up too.
If it then turns out that this new family consists of your stepdadís six teenage sons who also happen to be vampires with varyingly severe degrees of emotional baggage and the natural instinct to treat you like a human sippy cup, then thatís several degrees of messed up.
Then thereís also that weird group of guys who keep talking about some girl named Eve, but thatís not your name at all!