He was restless again, trashing, the sheets tangling around his sweat soaked body. You sat up and propped your pillow up against the headboard, leaning back against it. You waited. He rolled onto his side, giving you the opportunity to grab the gun that he always kept under his pillow. You carefully put it down next to you on the nightstand.
It had started a couple of months ago. Heero had been sick of not being able to deal with his emotions, mostly because he didn’t want to upset you anymore and he had gone to the shrink at the preventers. You didn’t know what to think of it in the beginning. On one hand you were happy that Heero was trying to change, but on the other hand… you didn’t want him to change at all.
You had fallen for the stoic man you had met through your friend Hilde. He had been so cold in the beginning, but you had always liked a challenge and bit by bit you had gotten to know him better. He had opened up slowly, warming, but never all the way. In the first months it had frustrated you until you had learned that he simply didn’t know how to show his emotions. You had accepted it then.
The sessions with the shrink helped. Heero seemed to be more relaxed but at night… at night his past came back to haunt him. You admired his strength as he pulled himself through the nightmares night after night. You knew he had to get over the trauma himself. The only thing you could do was comfort him when he woke up.
Heero suddenly shot up straight, his eyes wide open with horror. He was gasping for breath and drops of sweat slid down his temples. He turned to look at you and you held out your arms in a welcoming gesture for comfort. He accepted immediately, falling into your arms with a sigh. You held him and ran your fingers through his damp hair, pressed kisses against his forehead.
It was during these lapses of his control that he showed you how vulnerable he really was and how much he needed you to be there for him. You took care of him then, held him, soothed his fears. You showed him that it was alright for him to be afraid, because you wouldn’t think less of him if he was.
Heero pressed his face against your stomach, a quiet sigh escaping him.
“Are you okay?” you asked softly.
You felt him relax and you smiled. He shifted, getting more comfortable against you.
“Go back to sleep,” you murmured while tightening your arms around him.
He lifted his head to look at you. “What about you?”
He shouldn’t be concerned about you. This was about him; and as long as he was okay you would be fine too. You smiled at him and pressed a kiss against his lips. “I’ll be fine.”
“Are you sure?” he asked, sounding uncertain.
“I am,” you assured him.
He rested his head on your stomach again. A sigh escaped him. “You should stop taking away the gun.”
“Right,” you said dryly, “I won’t risk you shooting me while you are in the middle of a nightmare.”
He chuckled. “Have I ever tried to shoot you?”
You pulled on his hair in a teasing manner. “No. But you fired a bullet at the door once.”
“Stop reminding me.” His hand sought yours.
You hid your smile in his hair. “Sleep, Heero.”
It didn’t take long for him to fall asleep again. You rested your cheek against the top of his head and closed your eyes as well. It would all be alright in the end. You knew it for sure.
- End -
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